Wisnae'Me wrote:

JayMann wrote:

I'm telling Martin anyway







Wisnae'Me we still on for breakfast

lets skip breakfast (as we will be to busy) and do dinner instead.

WOW! Jay's got a dinner date with Melissa Theuriau! (Or so she claims! ) Runner up - 2009 Best Avatar Award
Joint runner up - 2009 Outstanding Contribution Award
WINNER - 2008 ‘Best Thread’ Award – Beautiful Women Of The World
Runner Up - 2008 Comedian Of The Year Award
Runner Up - 2008’s Funniest Incident

06 RRS TDV6 HSE, Java/Ebony, PTI, Running Boards, Privacy, S/C Grille/Vents, Stormers, Tasmods - GONE - (

Breaking news: There has been an explosion in a Gold Mine in South Africa. Rescuers rushed to the pit and fortunately no one has been killed, but one man had his leg blown of. As he was bought to the surface he cried out "I'm finished. Who on earth will want to take on a one-legged Gold digger like me"!

"Not me" Paul McCartney was heard to mutter.

 

2009 Outstanding Contribution Award - Joint Runner Up
2009 'Tech-Head Of The Year' Award - Runner Up

Like it here? Then Donate to RRSPORT!!

 RRS TDV6 Gone but still around
SL55 AMG
760Li Alpina
BMW 535D M Sport
BMW X6 XDrive35D
BMW 320D Coupe M Sport
And A Van For Rex!

WINNER - 2008's Idler Of The Year
WINNER - 2008's Comedian Of The Year
WINNER - 2008's Funniest Incident

I love boobies i love boobies i love boobies cuz i'm a big kid now! (Come on everybody sing with me you know the words!)

1. Two blondes walk into a building..........you'd think at least one of them would have seen it.

2. Phone answering machine message - "...If you want to buy marijuana, press the hash key..."


3. A guy walks into the psychiatrist wearing only Clingfilm for shorts. The shrink says, "Well, I can clearly see you're nuts."


4. I went to buy some camouflage trousers the other day, but I couldn't find any.


5. I went to the butchers the other day and I bet him 50 quid that he couldn't reach the meat off the top shelf. He said, "No,the steaks are too high."


6. My friend drowned in a bowl of muesli. A strong currant pulled him in.


7. A man came round in hospital after a serious accident. He shouted, “Doctor, doctor, I can't feel my legs!" The doctor replied, "I know you can't, I've cut your arms off ".


8. I went to a seafood disco last week...and pulled a muscle.

9. Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly. They lit a fire in the craft, it sank, proving once and for all that you can't have your kayak and heat it.


10. Our ice cream man was found lying on the floor of his van covered with hundreds and thousands. Police say that he topped himself.


11. Man goes to the doctor, with a strawberry growing out of his head. Doc says "I'll give you some cream to put on it."


12. 'Doc I can't stop singing The Green, Green Grass of Home' "That sounds like Tom Jones syndrome.’Is it common?' "It's not unusual."

13. A man takes his Rotteweiller to the vet. "My dog is cross-eyed, is there anything you can do for him?" "Well," said the vet, "let's have a look at him" So he picks the dog up and examines his eyes, then he checks his teeth. Finally, he says, "I'm going to have to put him down." "What? Because he's cross-eyed?" "No, because he's really heavy"


14. Guy goes into the doctor's. "Doc, I've got a cricket ball stuck up my backside." "How's that?" "Don't you start."


15. Two elephants walk off a cliff...boom, boom!


16. What do you call a fish with no eyes? A fsh.


17. So I was getting into my car, and this bloke says to me "Can you give me a lift?" I said "Sure, you look great, the world's your oyster, go for it.'


18. Apparently, 1 in 5 people in the world are Chinese. There are 5 people in my family, so it must be one of them. It's either my mum or my Dad, or my older Brother Colin, or my younger Brother Ho-Cha-Chu? But I think its Colin.


19. Two fat blokes in a pub, one says to the other "Your round." The other one says "So are you, you fat bast**d!"


20. Police arrested two kids yesterday, one was drinking battery acid, and the other was eating fireworks. They charged one and let the other one off.


21. "You know, somebody actually complimented me on my driving today. They left a little note on the windscreen. It said, 'Parking Fine.' So that was nice."


22. A man walked into the doctors, he said, "I've hurt my arm in several places" The doctor said, "Well don't go there anymore"


23. Ireland's worst air disaster occurred early this morning when a small two-seater Cessna plane crashed into a cemetery. Irish search and rescue workers have recovered 1826 bodies so far and expect that number to climb as digging continues into the night Arctic Frost TDV6 SE. Aspen Leather, Cherry Wood, Privacy Glass, PTI, Tow Pack, Mudflaps, Tasmods, a new Fuelflap, a RRSport.co.uk umbrella in the boot & a RRSport.co.uk sticker on the rear glass.
__________________

Some people accuse me of thinking the world revolves around me, but I'm not stupid . . . I know it revolves around the sun. Which shines out of my @rse!!!

I need a day off work


I urgently needed a few days holiday, but because I
didn't have any leave due to me, I knew the Boss would
not allow me to take any time off.

I thought that maybe if I acted 'Mad' then he would
tell me to take a few days off.

So I hung upside down on the ceiling and made funny
noises.

My co-worker asked me what I was doing. I told her
that I was pretending to be a light bulb so that the
Boss would think I was 'Mad' and give me a few days
off.

A few minutes later, the Boss came into the office and
asked, 'What are you doing?' I told him I was a light
bulb. He said "'You are mad - take a few days off". I
jumped down and walked out of the office.

When my co-worker followed me, the Boss asked her
"...and where are you going?"

She said "I can't work in the dark!!"

 RRS TDV6 Gone but still around
SL55 AMG
760Li Alpina
BMW 535D M Sport
BMW X6 XDrive35D
BMW 320D Coupe M Sport
And A Van For Rex!

WINNER - 2008's Idler Of The Year
WINNER - 2008's Comedian Of The Year
WINNER - 2008's Funniest Incident

I love boobies i love boobies i love boobies cuz i'm a big kid now! (Come on everybody sing with me you know the words!)

All  Malaysia Boleh!
4.2SC Chawton White, Stormers
Tasmod's Sills, Wind Deflectors, LR Sills
Clear Side Repeaters, Towbar
Larini Sports Exhaust, K&N Air Filter
______________________________
WINNER - 2008 'Tech-Head Of The Year' Award
WINNER - 2009 Outstanding Contribution
WINNER - 2009 'Tech-Head Of The Year' Award

Tommy Cooper - Class!  Runner up - 2009 Best Avatar Award
Joint runner up - 2009 Outstanding Contribution Award
WINNER - 2008 ‘Best Thread’ Award – Beautiful Women Of The World
Runner Up - 2008 Comedian Of The Year Award
Runner Up - 2008’s Funniest Incident

06 RRS TDV6 HSE, Java/Ebony, PTI, Running Boards, Privacy, S/C Grille/Vents, Stormers, Tasmods - GONE - (

Husband: "Honey, when I die, will you marry again?"

Wife: "I am afraid I will. You know how much I hate solitude."

Husband: "Will you let him drive my car?"

Wife: "Well, I think so."

Husband: "Will you let him sit in my favorite chair?"

Wife: "Maybe."

Husband: "Will you let him have my gold watch?"

Wife: "Hmm..Maybe."

Husband: "Will you let him wear my nice suits?"

Wife: "No, he is shorter." Malaysia Boleh!
4.2SC Chawton White, Stormers
Tasmod's Sills, Wind Deflectors, LR Sills
Clear Side Repeaters, Towbar
Larini Sports Exhaust, K&N Air Filter
______________________________
WINNER - 2008 'Tech-Head Of The Year' Award
WINNER - 2009 Outstanding Contribution
WINNER - 2009 'Tech-Head Of The Year' Award

 Runner up - 2009 Best Avatar Award
Joint runner up - 2009 Outstanding Contribution Award
WINNER - 2008 ‘Best Thread’ Award – Beautiful Women Of The World
Runner Up - 2008 Comedian Of The Year Award
Runner Up - 2008’s Funniest Incident

06 RRS TDV6 HSE, Java/Ebony, PTI, Running Boards, Privacy, S/C Grille/Vents, Stormers, Tasmods - GONE - (

A man goes into a pub, and the barmaid asks what he wants. I want to
bury my face in your cleavage and lick the sweat from between your breasts' he says. 'You dirty git,' shouts the barmaid, 'get out before I fetch my husband.'

The man apologizes and promises not to repeat his gaffe. The barmaid
accepts this and asks him again what he wants. 'I want to pull your
pants down, spread yogurt between the cheeks of your bum and lick it all off' he says.

'You dirty filthy pervert. You're banned. Get out.' she storms.

Again, the man apologizes and swears never ever to do it again. 'One
more chance' says the barmaid. 'Now - what do you want?' 'I want to turn you upside down, fill your fanny with Guinness, and then drink every last
drop.'

The barmaid is furious at this personal intrusion, and runs upstairs to
fetch her husband, who's sitting quietly watching the telly.'

What's up, love?' he asks.

'There's a man in the bar who wants to put his head between my breasts
and lick the sweat off' she says.

'I'll kill him. Where is he?' storms the husband.

'Then he said he wanted to pour yogurt down between my bum cheeks and
lick it off' she screams.

'Right. He's dead' says the husband, reaching for a cricket bat.

'Then he said he wanted to turn me upside down, fill my fanny with
Guinness and then drink it all' she cries.

The husband puts down his bat and returns to his armchair,and switches
the telly back on.

'Aren't you going to do something about it?' she cries hysterically.

'Look, love - I'm not messing with someone who can drink 12 pints of
Guinness..... ' 

2009 Outstanding Contribution Award - Joint Runner Up
2009 'Tech-Head Of The Year' Award - Runner Up

Like it here? Then Donate to RRSPORT!!

 Arctic Frost TDV6 SE. Aspen Leather, Cherry Wood, Privacy Glass, PTI, Tow Pack, Mudflaps, Tasmods, a new Fuelflap, a RRSport.co.uk umbrella in the boot & a RRSport.co.uk sticker on the rear glass.
__________________

Some people accuse me of thinking the world revolves around me, but I'm not stupid . . . I know it revolves around the sun. Which shines out of my @rse!!!

 2005 Zambezi TDV6 - Gone but not forgotten
2009 Alaska TDV8 - Gone and much missed.



WINNER - 2009 �Idler Of The Year� Award
Runner Up - 2009 �Just Doing What It�s Designed To Do� Award


DO NOT CLICK HERE!

Great, shmoogle!!  Malaysia Boleh!
4.2SC Chawton White, Stormers
Tasmod's Sills, Wind Deflectors, LR Sills
Clear Side Repeaters, Towbar
Larini Sports Exhaust, K&N Air Filter
______________________________
WINNER - 2008 'Tech-Head Of The Year' Award
WINNER - 2009 Outstanding Contribution
WINNER - 2009 'Tech-Head Of The Year' Award