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JayMann



Member Since: 19 Jan 2006
Location: Stop acting like snob when you just won the Lotto!
Posts: 22898
United Kingdom 2006 Range Rover Sport TDV6 HSE Buckingham Blue

Rolling with laughter Rolling with laughter Rolling with laughter Rolling with laughter RRS TDV6 Gone but still around
SL55 AMG
760Li Alpina
BMW 535D M Sport
BMW X6 XDrive35D
BMW 320D Coupe M Sport
And A Van For Rex!

WINNER - 2008's Idler Of The Year
WINNER - 2008's Comedian Of The Year
WINNER - 2008's Funniest Incident

I love boobies i love boobies i love boobies cuz i'm a big kid now! (Come on everybody sing with me you know the words!)
Post #86707 Fri Feb 23 2007 3:24pm
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TonyMeg



Member Since: 10 Feb 2007
Location: North East
Posts: 128
United Kingdom 2006 Range Rover Sport TDV6 HSE Java Black

A Little Girl Goes To The Barbers With Her Dad And stands Next To Him Eating Her Cake While He As His Hair Cut

The Barber Says " Sweatheart, You're Gonna Get Hair On Your Muffin' ...... I Know She Replies, I'm Gonna Get Big t**s Too !!!!!!! Wink Whistle
Post #86795 Fri Feb 23 2007 10:50pm
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JayMann



Member Since: 19 Jan 2006
Location: Stop acting like snob when you just won the Lotto!
Posts: 22898
United Kingdom 2006 Range Rover Sport TDV6 HSE Buckingham Blue

Shocked Shocked Laughing RRS TDV6 Gone but still around
SL55 AMG
760Li Alpina
BMW 535D M Sport
BMW X6 XDrive35D
BMW 320D Coupe M Sport
And A Van For Rex!

WINNER - 2008's Idler Of The Year
WINNER - 2008's Comedian Of The Year
WINNER - 2008's Funniest Incident

I love boobies i love boobies i love boobies cuz i'm a big kid now! (Come on everybody sing with me you know the words!)
Post #86805 Sat Feb 24 2007 12:31am
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Cliff H



Member Since: 03 Dec 2005
Location: uk
Posts: 3233
United Kingdom 

Two young lovers go up to the mountains for a romantic winter vacation. When they get there, the guy goes out to chop some wood. When he gets back he says, "Honey, my hands are freezing!" She says, "Honey, put them here between my thighs and that will warm them up. After lunch he goes out to chop some more wood and comes back and says again, "Man, my hands are really freezing!" She says again, "Well, put them here between my thighs and warm them up." He does and again that warms him up. After dinner he goes out one more time to chop some wood to get them through the night. When he returns, he says again, "Honey, my hands are really freezing!" She looks at him and says: "For crying out loud, don't your ears ever get cold?"
Post #86807 Sat Feb 24 2007 12:46am
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TonyMeg



Member Since: 10 Feb 2007
Location: North East
Posts: 128
United Kingdom 2006 Range Rover Sport TDV6 HSE Java Black

PMSL Rolling with laughter
Post #86808 Sat Feb 24 2007 1:24am
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Kaine



Member Since: 27 May 2006
Location: Hills of Shropshire
Posts: 8902
United Kingdom 

Laughing Laughing
Post #86816 Sat Feb 24 2007 2:59am
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TB



Member Since: 19 Feb 2006
Location: Depends who wants to know . . .
Posts: 5927
United Kingdom 2006 Range Rover Sport TDV6 SE Arctic Frost

Laughing Laughing Arctic Frost TDV6 SE. Aspen Leather, Cherry Wood, Privacy Glass, PTI, Tow Pack, Mudflaps, Tasmods, a new Fuelflap, a RRSport.co.uk umbrella in the boot & a RRSport.co.uk sticker on the rear glass.
__________________

Some people accuse me of thinking the world revolves around me, but I'm not stupid . . . I know it revolves around the sun. Which shines out of my @rse!!!
Post #86820 Sat Feb 24 2007 8:53am
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JayMann



Member Since: 19 Jan 2006
Location: Stop acting like snob when you just won the Lotto!
Posts: 22898
United Kingdom 2006 Range Rover Sport TDV6 HSE Buckingham Blue

Laughing Laughing Thumbs Up RRS TDV6 Gone but still around
SL55 AMG
760Li Alpina
BMW 535D M Sport
BMW X6 XDrive35D
BMW 320D Coupe M Sport
And A Van For Rex!

WINNER - 2008's Idler Of The Year
WINNER - 2008's Comedian Of The Year
WINNER - 2008's Funniest Incident

I love boobies i love boobies i love boobies cuz i'm a big kid now! (Come on everybody sing with me you know the words!)
Post #86824 Sat Feb 24 2007 9:32am
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ENVOY



Member Since: 09 Nov 2006
Location: In the shit as usual
Posts: 5823
United Kingdom 2013 Range Rover Sport SDV6 Autobiography Arctic Frost

Laughing Laughing Laughing some of my Previous cars
--------------------------------
P38 Range Rover Autobiography
RRS 2.7 HSE Silver
RRS TDV8 HSE silver
FFRR Vogue black
Disco3 HSE silver
RRS 2.7 HSE silver
RRS 3.0 HSE BALTI BLUE
______________________________
current vehicles
RRS 3.0 L494 Autobiography
Audi R8 V10 Spyder
AC Cobra
Landrover Defender 90
Landrover Defender 110
Suzuki Jimney
Post #86846 Sat Feb 24 2007 11:56am
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TonyMeg



Member Since: 10 Feb 2007
Location: North East
Posts: 128
United Kingdom 2006 Range Rover Sport TDV6 HSE Java Black

A 70 year old man went to his doctor's office to get a sperm count. The doctor gave the man a jar and said, "Take this jar home and bring me back a sample tomorrow." The next day the 70 year old man reappears at the doctor's office and gives him the jar, which is as clean and empty as on - the previous day.

The doctor asked what happened and the man explains: "Well, doc, it's like this:
First I tried with my right hand, but, nothing.
Then I tried with-my left hand, but still nothing.
Then I asked my wife for help.
She - tried with her right hand, with nothing.
Then her left, but nothing.
She - even tried with her mouth,
first with the teeth in,
then with the teeth-out,
and still nothing.
We even called up the lady next door and-she tried with both hands and her mouth too, but nothing."

The doctor was shocked! "You asked your neighbor?" the old man replied, "yep, but no matter what we tried we couldn't get the DARN jar open!"
Rolling Eyes
Post #86848 Sat Feb 24 2007 12:12pm
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JayMann



Member Since: 19 Jan 2006
Location: Stop acting like snob when you just won the Lotto!
Posts: 22898
United Kingdom 2006 Range Rover Sport TDV6 HSE Buckingham Blue

1000th post in the jokes thread hope you like it


Murphy calls 2 c his mate Paddy who has a broken leg.
Paddy sez,
"Me feet r freezing mate, cud u nip upstairs and get my slippers"?
"No bother"
he says and runs upstairs.
There r Paddys two stunning 19 yr old twin daughters sitting on their bed.
"Hello girls, ur Dad sent me up here 2 s**g ye both."
" Censored off ya liar" they said.
"I'll prove it"
says Murphy.
So he shouts down the stairs,
"Both of them Pat?"
"Of course, whats the use of Censored ing one RRS TDV6 Gone but still around
SL55 AMG
760Li Alpina
BMW 535D M Sport
BMW X6 XDrive35D
BMW 320D Coupe M Sport
And A Van For Rex!

WINNER - 2008's Idler Of The Year
WINNER - 2008's Comedian Of The Year
WINNER - 2008's Funniest Incident

I love boobies i love boobies i love boobies cuz i'm a big kid now! (Come on everybody sing with me you know the words!)
Post #86853 Sat Feb 24 2007 12:38pm
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TB



Member Since: 19 Feb 2006
Location: Depends who wants to know . . .
Posts: 5927
United Kingdom 2006 Range Rover Sport TDV6 SE Arctic Frost

Shocked Shocked Whistle

Rolling with laughter Rolling with laughter Rolling with laughter Arctic Frost TDV6 SE. Aspen Leather, Cherry Wood, Privacy Glass, PTI, Tow Pack, Mudflaps, Tasmods, a new Fuelflap, a RRSport.co.uk umbrella in the boot & a RRSport.co.uk sticker on the rear glass.
__________________

Some people accuse me of thinking the world revolves around me, but I'm not stupid . . . I know it revolves around the sun. Which shines out of my @rse!!!
Post #86854 Sat Feb 24 2007 1:00pm
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TB



Member Since: 19 Feb 2006
Location: Depends who wants to know . . .
Posts: 5927
United Kingdom 2006 Range Rover Sport TDV6 SE Arctic Frost

A man and his friend were enjoying Deer Hunting Season in rural Arkansas near a blacktop highway.

A huge buck walked by and the hunter carefully drew his bow and took careful aim. But, before he could release his arrow, his friend pointed at a funeral procession passing on the road below their stand.

The hunter slowly let off the pressure on his bow, took off his hat, bowed his head and closed his eyes in prayer.

His friend was amazed. "Wow, that is the most thoughtful and touching thing I have ever seen. You are the kindest man I have ever known.

The hunter shrugged. "Yeah, well, we were married for 35 years." Arctic Frost TDV6 SE. Aspen Leather, Cherry Wood, Privacy Glass, PTI, Tow Pack, Mudflaps, Tasmods, a new Fuelflap, a RRSport.co.uk umbrella in the boot & a RRSport.co.uk sticker on the rear glass.
__________________

Some people accuse me of thinking the world revolves around me, but I'm not stupid . . . I know it revolves around the sun. Which shines out of my @rse!!!
Post #86855 Sat Feb 24 2007 1:01pm
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Cliff H



Member Since: 03 Dec 2005
Location: uk
Posts: 3233
United Kingdom 

Rolling with laughter Rolling with laughter Rolling with laughter Rolling with laughter Thumbs Up
Post #86856 Sat Feb 24 2007 1:03pm
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JayMann



Member Since: 19 Jan 2006
Location: Stop acting like snob when you just won the Lotto!
Posts: 22898
United Kingdom 2006 Range Rover Sport TDV6 HSE Buckingham Blue

Rolling with laughter Rolling with laughter RRS TDV6 Gone but still around
SL55 AMG
760Li Alpina
BMW 535D M Sport
BMW X6 XDrive35D
BMW 320D Coupe M Sport
And A Van For Rex!

WINNER - 2008's Idler Of The Year
WINNER - 2008's Comedian Of The Year
WINNER - 2008's Funniest Incident

I love boobies i love boobies i love boobies cuz i'm a big kid now! (Come on everybody sing with me you know the words!)
Post #86858 Sat Feb 24 2007 2:37pm
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