This is the private diary of a Viagra housewife...

Day 1
Just celebrated our 25th wedding anniversary with not much to celebrate. When it came time to re-enact our wedding night, he locked himself in the bathroom and cried.



Day 2
Today, he says he has a big secret to tell me. He's impotent, he says, and he wants me to be the first to know. Why doesn't he tell me something I don't know! I mean, he actually thinks I haven't noticed.



Day 3
This marriage is in trouble. A woman has needs. Yesterday, I saw a picture of Nelson's Column and burst into tears.



Day 4
A miracle has happened! There's a new drug on the market that will fix his 'problem'. It's called Viagra. I told him that if he takes Viagra, things will be just like they were on our wedding night. I think this will work. I replaced his Prozac with the Viagra, hoping to lift something other than his mood.



Day 5
What absolute bliss!!.



Day 6
Isn't life wonderful but it's difficult to write while he's doing that.



Day 7
This Viagra thing has gone to his head. No pun intended! Yesterday, at Burger King, the manager asked me if I'd like a Whopper. He thought they were talking about him. But, have to admit it's very nice - I don't think I've ever been so happy.



Day 8
I think he took too many over the weekend. Yesterday, instead of mowing the lawn, he was using his new friend as a weed wacker. I'm also getting a bit sore down there.



Day 9
No time to write. He might catch me.



Day 10
Okay, I admit it. I'm hiding. I mean, a girl can only take so much. And to make matters worse, he's washing the Viagra down with neat whisky! What am I going to do? I feel tacky all over....



Day 11
I'm basically being screwed to death. It's like living with a Black and Decker drill. I woke up this morning hot-glued to the bed. Even my armpits hurt. He's a complete pig.



Day 12
I wish he was gay. I've stopped wearing make-up, cleaning my teeth or even washing but he still keeps coming after me! Even yawning has
become dangerous...



Day 13
Every time I shut my eyes, there's a sneak attack! It's like going to bed with a scud missile. I can hardly walk and if he tries that "Oops, sorry" thing again, I'll kill the bastard.



Day 14
I've done everything to turn him off. Nothing is working. I even started dressing like a nun but this just seems to make him more horny. Help me!



Day 15
I think I'll have to kill him. I'm starting to stick to everything I sit on. The cat and dog won't go near him and our friends don't come over any more. Last night I told him to go and himself and he did.



Day 16
The bastard has started to complain about headaches. I hope the bloody thing explodes. I did suggest he might try stopping the Viagra and going back on Prozac.



Day 17
Switched the pills but it doesn't seem to have made any difference...Christ! Here he comes again!



Day 18
He's back on Prozac. The lazy sod just sits there in front of the TV all day with that remote control in his hand and expects me to do everything for him. What absolute bliss! 08 2.7 RRS "S"
Td5 110......very modified
RS 5
Kawasaki ZX12R me, it's quick !

if only ! 

You should take Prozac with Viagra then if you don't get it up you don't give a Fu**

I took viagra once, it got stuck in my throat though.........had a stiff neck all day.

boom boom!

 Range Rover Vogue ‘17 TDV6

Gone: Range Rover Vogue '11 4.4TDV8, Range Rover Sport ‘59, Range Rover Sport ‘56

I have Viagra eye drops, they just make you look hard!

leedsunited wrote:

You should take Prozac with Viagra then if you don't get it up you don't give a Fu**

Haha us southern shandy drinkers don't need to worry about viagra  MY10 3.0 HSE Santorini Black, Ivory Premium & extended leather, privacy, paddles, diamond turned alloys, Ipod lead that charges, tasmods, rrsport.co.uk stickers

Jeep 4.0 High Output XJ 94 6" teraflex lift, c/w rear coils, 9500lb winch, 35" TSL super swamper boggers, safari snorkel, custom made bumpers, tom woods custom double cardon driveshaft, twin electric fans. Don't follow it..............you wont make it. The first 4 x 4 by far.

I heard they gave Viagra to men in old people's homes, to stop them falling out of bed at night!!

NickM wrote:

I heard they gave Viagra to men in old people's homes, to stop them falling out of bed at night!!

 Malaysia Boleh!
4.2SC Chawton White, Stormers
Tasmod's Sills, Wind Deflectors, LR Sills
Clear Side Repeaters, Towbar
Larini Sports Exhaust, K&N Air Filter
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